We are socially built to communicate and it is not a secret that besides feelings, a relationship also needs communication to survive. Feelings and a good communication are key to building a strong, healthy, long lasting relationship. If you recently entered one and you’re very much in love but you’re worried about not being very skilled at communicating, we will gladly teach you a few tips and tricks. To begin with, it is important for you to have the will to learn and develop a nonviolent, non-judgmental type of communication. This is easily achievable as long as you pay attention to some details and make the difference between a few perception nuances. We will detail everything below, so check this article and follow the tips and tricks; it will surely help you improve your relationship communication skills.
- Observation is better than evaluation and interpretation. Let’s take a common situation, when your partner is late for a date. A lot of people immediately jump to conclusions and interpret that their partner does not find them interesting or important. That is passive aggressive and this is a situation in which you simply have to observe that your partner is late; that’s more than enough. Say something like ‘’I realize you were late’’ and don’t evaluate the situation.
- Feelings are not equal with thoughts. Always communicate your feelings. They develop from the emotions that you experience and if you don’t communicate them, then they will stick to the level of thought and will pile up in a negative way. Just make sure that if these feelings are not positive, you communicate them in a non-violent way.
- Need vs strategy. You might not see this as an important detail but you need to learn to understand your needs. Once you do this, please communicate these to your partner and give him or her the chance to decide if your needs meet theirs. If he or she wants to meet your needs, then you are clearly on the same page and your relationship will most likely evolve in a fabulous way.
- Request and demand. Last but not least, you should learn how to make a request without demanding it. Demanding is authoritarian and does allow your partner to express his or her feelings and thoughts.
The steps mentioned above might seem simple but you’ll see that it is not that easy to apply them. You probably understand them in theory but when it comes to practice, you often let yourself pray to momentary emotions and this is how mistakes appear. Mistakes are natural and we all make mistakes; after all, we’re all made of the same ingredients. However, it is important for you to acknowledge the fact that you are at risk of committing mistakes, so the more aware you become, the easier it gets to avoid unpleasant situations. Relationships are hard but they’re not impossible and they are so beautiful that they are worth the effort. I know that you will love being in a relationship!